The idea of marriage has been distorted in our minds by fairytales, making us believe it’s a bed of roses. In actuality, it takes a lot of work, communication, and understanding to sustain it. Marriage is a beautiful bond that brings together backgrounds, personalities, and perspectives, uniting two souls. However, a few habits and expectations accompanying life’s daily challenges can lead to disagreements, disappointments, and aggressive reactions.
When it comes to married couples or those in a relationship, behavioral changes are typical causes behind disputes. Communication and understanding need to be coherent within a couple in order to strengthen their bond with each other. This is where a family counselor steps in to analyze the complications and get to the root of the problem. Trauma and other issues can be embedded beyond marriage, eventually creating a huge mess. But marriage counselors not only identify the issue but also find a suitable solution. That is exactly what Dr. Maysa Shahin is known for.
Dr. Maysa is one of the best family counselors in the Middle East, popular for her different techniques for changing behavioral patterns and resolving her client’s marital conflicts. She has a bachelor’s degree in medicine and a master’s degree in health administration and management. Dr. Maysa has become a household name among the Gulf countries, with over 20 years of experience in anger therapy, family counseling, and couple therapy.
Whenever there is an argument between a couple, Dr. Maysa advises her clients to remain calm rather than react to it immediately. An expert family counselor, she helps couples tackle unavoidable marital conflicts in clever ways and find different solutions to such problems. According to Dr. Maysa, when a conflict arises, it can break you apart from your loved one. So it is important to seek therapy as soon as a couple feels something is not right in their relationship as it allows one to bounce back and make things work.
There is no denying that families and relationships can get more complicated, especially if there is a lack of communication. Conflicts, arguments, and disagreements are part and parcel of our lives, but dealing with such problems requires self-control and counseling. Dr. Maysa is of the view that issues vary from person to person, but some common conflicts occur mainly between spouses that might involve children, in-laws, or other factors that sway the grounding of any relationship.
As far as her loyal clientele is concerned, Dr. Maysa ensures to assist them with any dispute or stress between the couple and also helps them reignite that fire and passion the couple once had. Here are a few tips she shares that can help couples resolve conflicts intelligently.
Welcoming and adapting your spouse’s conceptions
Marriage is a mutual contract in which both the participants agree to learn, grow and appreciate each other in every way possible, that too, for a lifetime. However, they need to come to an understanding without giving rise to conflicts. At times, it can be a bit hard to agree on everything, but reacting aggressively to every little issue will not solve anything. Instead, responding with a positive mindset is vital to understand the differences, eventually resulting in a stronger bond than before. Dr. Maysa believes that a life partner completes you in ways you have not imagined; you just need to learn how and when. So, according to the expert, accepting your spouse the way they are is of utmost importance.
Being selfless is the key
During the initial stages of your relationship, whether dating or engaged, you are in the process of knowing one other before taking it to the next level. Dr. Maysa shares that usually, what happens at the beginning is that one tends to focus more on how the other makes you feel. You often say things like, ‘I feel good when I am with you,’ ‘you make me feel alive, and ‘you validate me’ – but marriage is so much more than that. Once you tie the knot with your loved one, as a couple, you realize being there for each other and being selfless is what makes your relationship work. Moreover, the trait of forgiveness helps a marriage last longer; unfortunately, it is the exact opposite in most cases. Being married allows both wife and husband to work on being selfless and reaching a mutual point without conflicts.
Stop blaming and start accepting the responsibility
Dr. Maysa advises her clients to become more self-aware first before moving on to others. Whether it’s your attitude, tone of voice, or offensive words that add to the problem, you must fix that and then address your spouse. Once you both know what your faults are, it will be easier to resolve the conflict. Dr. Maysa Shahin adds, “I think it is always better to acknowledge your mistakes before pointing fingers at others. Because by doing so, you will only increase the fights and will never come to a mutual understanding”.
Having resolved many cases during her career, Dr. Maysa Shahin finds it comforting to help others. She loves what she does and makes it possible for her clients to live an ideal married life. If you feel there is an issue that is getting out of your hands, it is wise to consult a therapist or family counselor to identify the problem and then emphasize resolving solutions without damaging the bond with your significant other.
